Archive for the ‘Internet’ Category

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Birth of a Meme? Please?

February 3, 2009

I have introduced a new phrase to the Internet via real-world interaction. Go forth, and make “The Cave of Naked Boomers” a meme.

Oh yeah, and there’s also a Q&A with the writer of the recent BSG episode “The Oath” in there, too.

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In Honor of the Dearly Departed

July 8, 2008

Sen. Jesse Helmsfuneral is today.

To honor this great man’s passing, I offer you a touching serenade to his steadfast and tireless devotion to bigotry and oppression.

(grainy Jesse Helms sample)
“Unless and until the American people demand the restoration of both moral and spiritual priorities, I simply do not believe that we’re going to solve any other problems as well.”

Big fat fuck from North Carolina state,
he’s a worthless piece of shit, he’s a paragon of hate,
he’s a redneck, fuck-face, brain-dead waste of space,
two-bit, two-timing, motherfucking pool of slime.
Against gay rights, and funding for the arts,
tried to cancel PBS and tear Big Bird apart.
Cut AIDS funding, corporate welfare for the rich,
he’s a shameless money grubber, he’s a two dollar bitch.

Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?

Fundamentalist, fuckwad, dickless prick,
he’s ugly as a morlock, dumb as a brick.
He’s a sack of shit, hypocrite, single-minded, fat bigot,
punk bitch, ignorant, ass-munch sycophant.
Life long friend of the deadly cancer sticks,
thinks AIDS is the fault of the people it afflicts.
Racist fuck who supports segregation,
foe of the people friend of the corporation.

Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?

Uh!
Damn.
Get up, get up!

Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Hurry up and die!

Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?
Why won’t Jesse Helms just hurry up and die?

Yo Jesse, you dumb-ass, racist, cracker motherfucker!
Why the fuck won’t you just hurry up and die?
And take that punk-bitch Strom Thurmond with you!

“Why Won’t Jesse Helms Just Hurry Up and Die?” by MC Hawking

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Pronking Sweet!

June 1, 2008

Congress Debates Merits Of New Catchphrase

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Charlton Heston is Dead

April 5, 2008

Charlton Heston is dead at age 84. This raises one immediate question in my mind: can we take his guns yet?

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Seen Around the Internet.

February 27, 2008

[21:32] GuttrMky: You know what would be awesome for Back to the Future 4?
[21:32] tgreatyoda: Not doing it?
[21:33] GuttrMky: They go into the future again, but find it to be an irradiated wasteland. They return to 1986 to spend their last days in their happiest time as the radiation posioning slowly eats away at their bone marrow.
[21:33] tgreatyoda: Lovely.
[21:33] GuttrMky: I know.
[21:34] GuttrMky: It’ll be the feel good movie of the year.
[21:34] tgreatyoda: Then you can do the reimagined Carebears.
[21:34] GuttrMky: Carebears: Raibes in Gumdrop Land.

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Spoiler Alert!

February 27, 2008

Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early

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Dun-dun-fucking-DUUUUUNNNN!

February 17, 2008

So I guess this means that the newspost for this was just a dirty fucking lie? How dare you, Jeph? I trusted you.