Archive for the ‘fan culture’ Category


Birth of a Meme? Please?

February 3, 2009

I have introduced a new phrase to the Internet via real-world interaction. Go forth, and make “The Cave of Naked Boomers” a meme.

Oh yeah, and there’s also a Q&A with the writer of the recent BSG episode “The Oath” in there, too.


I Just Finished Playing Max Payne

March 6, 2008

The crumbs were scattered down the counter like Hansel and Gretel’s roadtrip to Hell. The bread loaf, the apple, nothing else had been hit. Just the jar. Somebody knew what they wanted ahead of time. An inside job always stinks, and I was fresh out of Lysol.

“I told them I was saving them for the potluck. Why would they do this?”

A good question. A better one would be, who are they?

“Honey, cut it out.”

The dame was feisty, I’ll give her that. She was all sleek curves and dangerous eyes that flashed like lightening or gunfire, take your pick. I like gunfire.

“Damnit John, just go talk to your boys!”

The perps were holed up in their rathole, a cramped attic filled with beds and dressers and little plastic landmines that hurt really bad if you stepped on them with bare feet. Bad like a moon rising in that song. The usual suspects were there. I knew Billy was a stoolie, but only when Tommy and Jimmy weren’t there to keep him in line. Worse luck, they were. They looked up, all puzzled innocence.

“Uh…dad? Why are you talking like-”

Clever, real clever of them. They were trying to take the lead in the conversation, I’d have to watch my back.

All right, you thugs, I said. Who took the cookies from the cookie jar?


“Dad, that’s a little harsh.”

I needed answers, not backtalk. This was going nowhere fast. Or everywhere slow, I couldn’t tell. Riddles upon riddles until my head hurt.

“Yeah, you seem like you might have hit it pretty hard.”

I still needed answers, bad. Ly. I had some leverage against them, I decided to use it. If I didn’t find out whodunit, I’d ground them like grounded pepper. Billy looked ready to crack. I asked them again about who took the cookies from the cookie jar.

“Tommy took the cookies from the cookie jar!”

“Me? Couldn’t be, I was at practice.”

Then who?

“Jimmy. Jimmy must have taken the cookies from the cookie jar.”

“You’re on crack, Billy. I don’t even like cookies, dumbass.”

But if the truth wasn’t behind door number one, and it wasn’t behind door number two, then what was behind door number three? The truth? I had my doubts.

“Okay, okay. I did it. I took the cookies from the cookie jar.”

This was a surprise. Sleet and ice water filled my veins. Something was wrong. A big something. The kind of something that gets called the Blankity-blank Incident for years to come. I had no evidence. Why would Billy cop to it? What’s his angle?


The dame was calling from down below, like a voice out of Hell.

“Never mind, I found crumbs all over the dog’s bed. And I heard that voice of Hell thing, you’re sleeping on the couch.”

One mystery solved, but I’d stumbled across something even bigger. Why would Billy take the fall for Rex?

“I…I just didn’t want to be grounded.”

The last shoe, dropped at last. It was a big line of shoes, like at Footlocker.

“Wait, you didn’t want to be grounded for something the dog did, so you tried to get us grounded instead? Don’t go to sleep tonight, twerp. I’m warning you.”

Oh. Well then. Tom, Jim, be nice to your brother. Billy, watch your back.


Seen Around the Internet.

February 27, 2008

[21:32] GuttrMky: You know what would be awesome for Back to the Future 4?
[21:32] tgreatyoda: Not doing it?
[21:33] GuttrMky: They go into the future again, but find it to be an irradiated wasteland. They return to 1986 to spend their last days in their happiest time as the radiation posioning slowly eats away at their bone marrow.
[21:33] tgreatyoda: Lovely.
[21:33] GuttrMky: I know.
[21:34] GuttrMky: It’ll be the feel good movie of the year.
[21:34] tgreatyoda: Then you can do the reimagined Carebears.
[21:34] GuttrMky: Carebears: Raibes in Gumdrop Land.



February 17, 2008

So I guess this means that the newspost for this was just a dirty fucking lie? How dare you, Jeph? I trusted you.


Well fucking FINALLY!

February 6, 2008

The Evangelion remake has started to migrate out of Japan. First stop…Korea? Seriously? I mean, I know they’re close and all, but I have to think that we have a higher nerd population over here.

Okay, on second thought, no, I’m not surprised. Any nation that will make Starcraft its national sport is definitely fertile ground for an anime debut.

In any case, ANN has Eva’s American release set as February 22. I won’t have to live with the shakes for much longer. Hooray!


Jack Thompson All But Admits A Personal Dislike of Gamers in General

December 31, 2007

EDIT: Jesus, I’m a fucking idiot. This all happened two years ago.

Every gamer’s favorite dickhole is up to his old tricks again. Come on and all to be amazed at Jack’s witheringly condescending dismissal of a polite British gamer’s helpful words of advice. See how his ugly and crude correspondence reveals the truth we’ve suspected all along:

Jack Thompson hates gamers.

It’s not violent games being inappropreately sold to minors that gets his goat, no, it’s the actual gamers he wants to demean and vilify. He hates all of us. He hates us on a visceral, unreasoning level.

According to Jack, if you play games, you don’t have ideas; it’s a contradiction in terms. The only people who think about games, apparently, are the people who only think bad things about games.

Now I think I disagree with the polite British gentleman (who goes by the name Plagiarize of all things) who posted this exchange. I am staunchly against any kind of legislation relating to the content of video games whatsoever. I’m all in favor of a voluntary ratings system combined with strong parental education efforts, perhaps even with an industry-generated code of conduct requiring stores to pledge not to sell M-rated games to minors if they want to be allowed to stock any ESRB-rated games at all, but no government.

But you see, it’s okay for me and him to disagree on this. In fact, it’s probably healthy that gamers have such a wide spread of opinions. And if there really was a healthy exchange of debate on this topic within the gamer community, then gamers like Plagiarize would have a valuable contribution to make. But there is no such healthy debate in gamerland, and much of the blame for that rightly lands at Jack Thompson’s feet.

Because he doesn’t want a debate. He wants a pogrom.



December 9, 2007

Oh my. Oh my, oh my.

A slew of Japanese animation studios are working together with Bruce Timm to create a series of shorts about Batman to be released sometime next year.

The stories will fit within the Batman Begins continuity, but they will also be able to stand alone.

I think I will have to buy a gun, because after I see this, I will need to kill myself in order to assure that I die happy.