Archive for the ‘9/11’ Category


Behold My Brilliant Use of Subtle Metaphor!

October 2, 2007

So there was a group of us riding in a van down the highway. Recently, we’d had an argument over who would get to drive, but that was pretty much settled and done with.

Then some asshole rear-ended us, and a couple of us got hurt real bad. Later there would be some argument over whether or not we should have sold this guy a car several years ago in the first place, or if the driver should have seen him coming in the rear-view mirror, but for the moment, we were just pissed. So we take off after this guy and along the way we get on the phone and call a couple of our buddies out with us and we’re all chasing the bastard down the road, ramming him like he did to us. We got in a few good hits, and just when it looked like we were about to drive the son of a bitch right off the road, our driver saw a sign on the side of the road:

Alligator farm- 10 miles

The driver said to us, “Hey, since this guy is an asshole, let’s go drive into the alligator farm and start running over the alligators.”

And about half of us in our van, and most of the people our friend’s cars all said, “What the fuck are you smoking? Are you insane? These alligators have nothing to do with the man who rammed us.” Read the rest of this entry ?


The Truth About 9/11

September 17, 2007

The real twisted genius of the 9/11 conspiracy theory is that at first blush, it makes a crude sort of sense. We’re supposed to be the strongest nation on Earth, so how could we be so grievously wounded by 19 men with box cutters? How could they have gotten past our invincible Federal Government? Answer: they couldn’t have. Therefore, it must be an inside job. This is sort of the logic equivalent of a hastily constructed false-front set for a movie, where buildings are represented by painted sheets of particle board nailed to a frame of 2×4’s. Sure it looks fine from a distance, but if you walk over and give it one good kick, the whole damn thing is likely to fall over and crush somebody.

Read the rest of this entry ?


The Anniversary Rant

September 11, 2007

I didn’t want to put what’s following in this in my first 9/11 post because I thought it would be gaudy and detract from observing the memorial.

So it’s 9/11, and that almost doesn’t mean anything these days; it’s been too politicized. Ezra Klein has a great post on that that you should read.

Almost as if on cue I have seen several conservative bloggers use this anniversary as an opportunity to smear their political opponents and to wrap themselves in the funeral shrouds of the dead with overly solemn pledges “never to forget.” To forget what? That some of us were murdered by a man who, if he’s still alive, remains at large? That we were the ones who trained and funded that very same man when he happened to be the enemy of our enemy? That the deaths caused by that man were used to justify an illegal war in Iraq which had nothing to do with him?

Every year the people who make the most noise about solemn remembrance and weeping for the dead are always the ones who turn around in the next breath and use that same event as a crude political cudgel to batter their rivals into submission with. It’s as if they know that they come off as disgusting monsters, but that they think that if they get melodramatic enough about their sorrow and pain- while of course never forgetting to imply that some other people who won’t be named until the appropriate moment of this annual Kabuki dance arrives don’t care about the deaths- that we will forget, or at least ignore, that they are using the bodies of our dead as props in a grotesque exhibition of political theater to support more death, and more horror, and eventually more 9/11s.

I don’t understand it. I want to, but I just don’t. Are they really that scared? Are they just being cynical and manipulative? If so, what are they trying to manipulate people into supporting? A police state? Why? And why can’t they just consider for a moment that maybe there’s a smarter way to solve our problems than by blindly continuing a cycle of violence?


The Anniversary Post

September 11, 2007

So it’s September 11th again. 3,000 of us were killed. But for one bright, shining moment in the week that followed, we were a single country. I hope I don’t ever forget what that was like.